Story

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TUESDAY, DECEMBER 8, 2020

1:30 a.m.

I didn't sleep all night last night. I was up the whole day. ██████████████████████████████████ █████████████████████████████████████████████████████ █████████████████████████████████████████████████

I'm so tired. I'll probably watch Ratched tomorrow. It's a 6 out of 10 TV show. It's mediocre, it's terrible, it's an okay rating because a lot of effort went into it. It's really terrible. I'm so tired. I'm going to sleep soon.

5:30 p.m.

I woke up some time in the afternoon. I had a hard to describe dream. That's what I think separates us from machine, from computers and ai, it's our dreams. I remembered it when I woke up, I was thinking about it, but then I forgot. I can't remember what i dreamt. I do remember i stretched out my hand for some reason in the dream and someone, a friend most likely, he or maybe less than likely, a girl, he made comments that my arm should be a lot longer or something. It was weird. That's just it. I was thinking deep thoughts about that dream, it's just so strange how you remember things, you think about it, it means so much to you, it's at the centre of your mind, all the attention, and then suddenly, poof, it vanishes, it goes away, forgotten, obsolete, then oblivion, never happened.

I will never charge money for my writing. If I publish a book, I'll never charge for it, maybe charity proceeds, but never my name mentioned, never for profit, I won't accept any money for anything I write because it's too sacred. You can't be like that guy who author Stephen King wrote about in 1979 called The Dead Zone, called Greg Stillson who sold bibles and kicked a dog to death -- and predicted Trump just like Back to the Future.

Here is a short copy paste from Wikipedia:

"In an unconnected incident, a young, emotionally troubled door-to-door Bible salesman named Greg Stillson vindictively kicks a dog to death."

I can't charge for anything, it feels wrong to me. I charge for the cyber security business, but that's business and we need to pay people to do the complicated, painful and difficult tasks involved in cyber security.

████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████ But I thought about it, or it occurred to me it was because in Judaism you can't mix life and death, you can't mix meat with milk, you can't mix it up, it's not right for them. Or something I hear.

I also remembered for unexplainable reasons that Bentsi ben Atar teaching me that in Hebrew translation to English that "better a good name than good oil". I was thinking about whether I should say that to Ron, Jim, Steve and Jay in response to their observations or if I should say that to Thilanga uncle or to both, which is in my nature. Bentsi is from Unit 8200, Israeli Army Signals Intelligence Corps, he was the head or team leader of the technology division. ██████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████ ████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████ He got me a pizza after I refused innumerably, I hope it's not due to B--k Of The L-w decreeing thou shalt buy thy enemies foods, I didn't mean anything by telling Bentsi I was sick of his money phobic allergy to cash hehehe hic hic.. I can't remember the joke, but it was very funny, ███████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████

I was thinking sometimes, when I write a Captain's Log entry, it doesn't enter, it changes, or if it's over 8,000 characters, it doesn't enter or edit, then, like the dream, it is forgotten because it wasn't written down, something that measurement advocate Peter Drucker would agree with, I'm sure. I now copy things, in case it's important. I also saw some very cool things about Facebook that I'm going to keep secret and maybe tell Jacques Huyghebaert and the few trustworthy people only.

The other thing about dreams is that it can be that it's a reflection of something deeper going on in your life. Maybe the dreams are the dreams of your father and mother. Or the others in your life. Maybe. Maybe it's the foods we eat, the animals or the memory of the plants or plant based foods or the water. Maybe, it's from G-d or if it's a nightmare it's from Satan, or the angels and demons, the wet dreams, I guess, are difficult to ascribe or credit to heaven or earth or hell, maybe to nature or science, I don't know, and even if I did i don't tell. Maybe it's karma or energy. Maybe it's about past lives if you're a Buddhist. It's hard to say. It's interesting.

6:15 p.m.

Oh f*** me. I forgot to add a timestamp. Isn't that just like me? I get carried away. Don Vito Corleone wouldn't give me anything important, I'm not a reliable person, I get carried away. I'd make them look like murderers, despite what that undertaking said, disrespecting Corleone on the day of his daughter's wedding hehehe..

I was thinking about stuff. I was thinking about whether we live in a world that's forgotten about Buddhism.