Using Captain's Log to Process Sri Lanka's Pain

ஜனவரி 22, 2021

The day moves from pausing Masonic meetings during Covid and admiring Amanda Gorman's Biden poem into a clearer statement of what this journal is for: a record, an alibi, and a place to process Sri Lanka's war trauma while still hoping for judicial reform and recovery.

மறைந்தது

1:30 PM

Friday, January 22nd, 2021

1:30 p.m.

"Masonic Meetings During Covid-19"

I advised my Lodge Secretary Daya Ratnayake (Not Army Leader!) that I vote against conducting masonic meetings as I feel it is best to wait until it is safe to continue.

2:00 PM

Friday, January 22nd, 2021

2:00 p.m.

"Poetry for President Biden and VP Harris"

I saw this on Jonathan's The Food Dictator blog post, this young lady does a beautiful performance reciting this well written poem -- I felt Lin Manuel Miranda's Hamilton inspired certain parts of her work, such as the references to the biblical fig tree:

https://youtu.be/Jp9pyMqnBzk

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* King James Bible, Micah 4:4:

But they shall sit every man under his vine and under his fig tree; and none shall make them afraid: for the mouth of the LORD of hosts hath spoken it.

It is also worth mentioning in Buddhism, the fig tree is sacred, it is known as the Bodhi tree, it is where Buddha gained the supreme bliss of enlightenment.

Performance in Obama's White House: https://youtu.be/uV4UpCq2azs *

I have copied this from the UK's Independent Newspaper from this Web URL link:

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-election-2020/amanda-gorman-poem-transcript-inauguration-b1790356.html

8:15 PM

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8:15 PM (b)

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12:45 AM

Friday, January 22nd, 2021

8:00 p.m.

"Real Purpose of Capt.'s Log"

* How Lehan Edirisinghe will look at this journal when interogated one day *

"Hello detective Lasantha!

Oh, where was I and what was I doing in the afternoon on Friday, January 22nd, 2021?

Let me check my Captain's Log entries.

Let's see here..

hmm... "

https://youtu.be/Dz5gCS1tefY

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drawings*

I can't find a clip of Patrick Bateman's journal where you find his drawings

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I also used to draw the same things! But I was only like 5 or 6. I blossomed a lot earlier than Patrick Bateman. Some of us are a lot brighter.

Beautiful work, beautiful work...

He is a good painter..

My art teacher Rhuani Rambukwelle is a Christian, so she did not like how I painted stuff I like, she insisted I draw and oil paint boring stuff

So, I negotiated with her and settled on a crocodile and a volcano

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She was not happy.

She advised me, "be a gentleman!"

* My grandma and many strangers bought my paintings, I earned about Rs 20,000 LKR cash *

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Titanic Rose is Drawn:

https://youtu.be/YXysWEf6_U8

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They are all looking for her: * Dark Joke *

https://youtu.be/HsRvgCsLXWw

SONNY

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CLEMENZA

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SONNY

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HAGEN

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SONNY

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CLEMENZA

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Gotta send a copy of my manuscript to my masonic brother Jamie Mollart before I publish

* Psst... I will never credit him, ever *

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http://www.jamiemollart.co.uk/

I don't really care about money, anything I write is for charity, I will donate any proceeds to multiple charities I like * Good Idea. Cyber is for profit. *

Some people pray and even bet/ wager, tomorrow, this guy will not write violence, crime, ███████████, etc

* Some of these comment entries were posted without a timestamp, so, it is like a jigsaw puzzle to complete *

1:00 AM

Saturday, January 23rd, 2021

12:45 a.m

1:00 a.m.

1:15 a.m.

1:45 a.m.

I feel a lot better now. I quickly saw I felt happier. It was in the past. I should not feel responsible for everything, everyone every time. I feel okay. Just normal. Not happy, not sad. I have adjusted. This stuff, this civil war stuff, it is in the past. There is a lot of potential. There is no real reason to be sad about anything. Plus, I did not see any blood, I saw only people on YouTube.

I think Sheryl Sandberg is doing some Facebook Live talk soon at 2:00 a.m. I should check it out. I draw a lot of inspiration from her, she taught me resilience. I want to be like her, I want to write a book, then publish and give it out for free to help people in SL heal and become tough and masters and bosses of life.

She is doing it at 2:30 a.m. I have time. She is Glinda from Wizard of Oz. Even though I am a guy, I like her a lot more as a leader than Lee Kuan Yew or Barack Obama or Donald Trump or anyone! She is a good person. I will also help a lot of people in SL. I know I can do it. A lot of people like me too, I am also becoming increasingly popular. Everyone seems to be enthralled by the stuff I write.

I have cast a spell on people! It is cool. I think a lot. I think (blowing my own trumpet) I love how honest, brave and how much empathy I have for everyone. ███████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████

2:00 a.m.

I will go and make myself a cup of tea. It really hurts me in the chest to think about the civil war in SL. I just cannot believe it happened. It was so unnecessary. ████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████

2:15 a.m.

I dunno. It was not all bad. I am happy things improved. The Tamils are all safe and integrated now. What I want to do, is somehow find ways to deploy technologies to make things better. I am competitive, I want to see SL doing better. I am hurt there is a corrupt culture here, but it is good Thilanga uncle is helping in a limited capacity. I gotta write to James soon.

Can't wait, this Sheryl Sandberg show will start in 12 minutes at 2:30 a.m. I love to write. I never look at my keyboard. I type very fast too. I need to switch on a light, I hear it is bad to stare at a screen in the dark.

I was just hearing the song, "One Last Time" in Lin Manuel Miranda's Hamilton in my head. "George Washington's coming home... "

I love that song. Beautiful piece, Miranda is a genius!

Love it.

(I think I memorised some of the words unintentionally).

2:30 a.m.

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I am lucky I had two great psychiatrists Dr Trevor Friedman and Dr Joshua Kua in England and Singapore, respectively.

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I will fight G-d's battles and try to improve the situation in SL from my personal experiences and insights. I want to save people from suicides.

2:45 a.m.

3:00 a.m.

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The show finished. It was just 1 hour long. It was not that interesting. It was quite boring. I am feeling dehydrated and my chest is hurting. I feel regret that I chose to or was forced back here to SL. The problem is even if my family is doing well, there is a severe unwillingness to cooperate or achieve anything. There is a lot of dishonesty, lacking and low awareness.

I dunno. Maybe that is not entirely true. My mum, upon Jacques' suggestion, spoke with her brother Thilanga, he is somewhat expressing willingness to help, although, I get the impression he does not care or genuinely wish to do so.

4:15 a.m.

Will sleep. 45 mg Remeron

1:00 p.m.

I just woke up. I am still feeling sleepy. I have to do something about this James situation. I will work on this. I am writing a "plan" for him. I did not still get an apology, but I am sure he is sorry now..