I Chose Calm Over Violence, Then Got Lost in Late-Night Links

January 2, 2020

I spent the day trying to hold the line against violence and chaos, then drifted through war anxiety, race arguments, and a long chain of late-night reading I couldn’t stop.

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 20, 2020

4:30 p.m.

I'm feeling a lot better. ███████ anyone is a stupid idea. You don't get anything. It doesn't serve a purpose or make any sense. Even if someone did something bad to you, doing bad things isn't going to make anything better. Tamir Pardo is wrong, it's not always essential, it's better to figure out clever solutions.

I ordered 500 g of pink Himalayan salt at 130 LKR per 200 g. I'll use it to gargle, as I heard it's good for you. I imagined my tongue ulcer is oral cancer, but doctor Jayasinghe at Asiri Central Hospital looked at it and said was just my tongue's tastebuds. It was just swollen. Perfectly normal.

I made myself a hot cup of Horlicks and served some love cake my mum made. Soon, Uber Eats will deliver the 500 g of salt and also an airtight mug, to use for salt washing. I haven't brushed my teeth since last morning, I'll brush soon. I need a shower. I was doing interesting legal work with Lakmal Perera.

4:45 p.m.

Okay fine, maybe Tamir Pardo is right, but you don't have to always do it. █████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████

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6:00 p.m.

I did the Himalayan salt gargle, but too much cold water. I applied something cooling on my tongue, I almost bulimic gag vomited by the motion of applying gel to my tongue back. I have a lot of phlegm it seems. I'm feeling a bit sick. Waiting to get operational with support from uncle Thilanga. I can't remember name of gel, will type soon.

10:15 p.m.

I checked that gel I put in my tongue. It's called Metrogyl denta and has Metronidazole as the active ingredient. It's cooling, tastes good. ████████████████████████████████ The salt gargle will do a world of good for me. My sister has greedily eaten a sausage that was meant for me which we got from Allstar restaurant by my cousins Chadu and Chathula. I claimed I bought McDonald's a few days ago which my mum didn't reimburse me for, and grabbed 2,000 LKR. I don't really honestly like Sri Lankan food, but I like Maggi just as much as I like McDonald's. I like McDonald's more than Domino's and Pizza Hut, more than KFC depending on my mood. But I don't care really. I'm like a monk, I don't care all that much. I love the Maggi instant noodles that I make for myself. It's just great. I get two bowls, I pile one on the other, (so it isn't hot for me to carry), then I gently slightly crush the noodle cake, maybe I cut open the seasoning powder, (very ███████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████), then pour the boiling hot water, then, depending on how much of a rush I'm in, I add the chili oil at the start itself along with the seasoning or add it in the end. Sometimes, I open it up, then stir with my big spoon. It's like al dente spaghetti. I don't like it when Maggi is too hard or too mushy soft. I like it. It's my favourite. It's soupy delicious broth and noodles, just amazing.

MONDAY, DECEMBER 21, 2020

3:00 a.m.

Omg it's almost Christmas day. I love Jesus Christ so much! Yay, I'm so happy it's Christmas soon. I also noticed that I wrote 53 weeks, some years have extra weeks maybe.

I had a 4 hour chat with Lakmal Perera about our legal employment agreement and to discuss our plans. I work tirelessly. I'll always love to work hard. I like to stay active, I can't just stop or do nothing. I need to stay active like a shark must swim always, it's a double edged sword but it has it's perks.

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It's sad, i always look around, look at everyone equally, try my best to love people for who they are, try my best to see the good in people, and I just tend to only like so few:

Jonathan is my most favourite person in the world. He's just like me, he's into enjoying the craft, he loves food and drink, he's very friendly and cool.

I'll be very sad if he and Jacques weren't around. I'm already sad Jacques is going to die soon because he's 75 and he's so old..

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3:15 a.m.

They weren't really dumb and stupid

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Sigh, I guess, Bhante Saranapala and my two cousins can anyway do all my work or whatever is expected of me on my behalf and absence. It's truly disturbing for me how I've become almost reliant on these drugs to eat and sleep and get through a day, they're my walking cane and crutch.

It most likely won't get any better. Or maybe it will. It's good to be optimistic. If the Mirtazapine can do so much good, that means that medicine and healthcare can make this work and I can recover. I probably just need more medical intervention and to stop stressing out so much.

Plus, a lot of good things are happening. My kidneys or liver aren't ruined by my intake of Mirtazapine as far as I can tell. I guess, cognitive behavioral therapy is not an easy thing, but I could try it again. Maybe, things will just work. Maybe, I'll snap out of it. Maybe, this stuff is all just in my head.

It's good to be positive. I'm having a lot of fun. Plus, I'm excited to try make Sri Lanka into a California. I love the sense of purpose I've got. It's exciting. I always wanted to be successful like Singapore, but I hate their ugly social laws and hateful, racist and judgemental attitudes towards gays and drug users, we can do better I'm certain.

Personally, until I went to England for university, despite having read the history books, I couldn't believe racism existed.

I stopped saying it.

If a human life is worth $2m on average,

It's good this racist was punished and publicly shamed, but she's just a product of her racist upbringing and environment, she deserves empathy and forgiveness because she redeemed herself by supporting BLM.

This guy, he didn't do the right thing by taking revenge, it was just as cowardly as it was courageous, he has a metaphorical grave ready for him as well if he doesn't forgive.

We're all learning.

:)

Miracle -- Pulp Fiction:

https://youtu.be/Mw8NR6p8gyI

MONDAY, DECEMBER 28, 2020

12:00 a.m.

Yesterday, I saw Andrew Lloyd Webber's Love Never Dies. It is similar to Phantom of the Opera which I love with 7.5 out 10, but Love Never Dies is terrible, it's a 3 out of 10.

I started downloaded and am watching Basic Instincts Uncut now. I can't remember if I've seen it, but I've heard it's good. I heard it's quite sultry.

I was also thinking Howard Stern is just like me because we both really love the ultimate Playboy Playmate Carmen Electra and Jenna Jameson

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I don't understand the stigma, I can't tell it apart because Jessica Alba in Sleeping Dictionary, that Halle Berry in Swordfish or

She got an award for that.

3:00 a.m.

I popped 60 mg Mirtazapine at around 10 p.m. last night, I'm getting sleepy. The dosage should be 15 mg. I need to reduce, I need my deals signed and relax comfortably building new technologies.

I can continue watching Basic Instincts tomorrow or something. It's very interesting. Gordon Gecko actor from Wall Street (1987), Michael Douglas, he's really good.

Thank G-d Hollywood through Halle Berry or Jessica Alba and many other beautiful actresses, Angelina Jolie with Antonio Banderas in Original Sin, they put like Riley featured in Blink 184's videos, Daisy * in 50 Cent's Disco Inferno,

-- many World Star Hip Hop idols, Maria and many Japanese Idols, Sunny in India through Vivid, Kim Kardashian through Vivid, like Mia who are on BBC or Mia who brought her real mum to a shoot on equal footing.

I had McDonald's for dinner. A double cheeseburger and meal with a McFlurry chocolate chip icecream. I hated the ice cream. The burger was salty, chips or fries were good.

I have a very severe problem where I crave very particular food or peculiar food. It's strange. I can't eat the same thing over and over again.

3:15 a.m.

I'm going to sleep soon. I'm sleepy.

9:45 a.m.

I woke up. I saw my laptop was automatically turning off under the automated windows task manager settings.

I am a little lethargic, I don't like filling my water bottle. I also didn't drink enough water yesterday.

So, I was dehydrated when waking up. I went and drank my coke from the fridge I got from McDonald's last night or at midnight.

I'm listening to music. I'm a little too cheap for Spotify, but I worry my YouTube video use is costing more on my limited SLT data plan.

I should get Spotify premium. I worry the hacked██████████████████████████████████) might have viruses.

11:15 a.m.

I'm watching Basic Instincts Uncut. It's a 6 out of 10 or 7.5, I can't make up my mind. Actually, it's a 8 or 9. But I can't decide. Maybe, average 7.625, so 7.5.

The writing is very clever.

It's all women's empowerment like Eyes Wide Shut, I want a girlfriend like this blonde chick and brunette chick like Michael Douglas does in this classic thriller masterpiece.

It was a big deal, all the rage. Eva had a pink or blonde wig which made her look different and some of the wore wigs, very hot.

11:30 a.m.

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1:15 p.m.

There are no regular meals. I missed breakfast. My mum is mismanaging, we're a personality mismatch.█████████████████

I just don't get along with people like her. That's why I don't friend any of her friends, we don't get along, there's people like them and people like me, we don't mix like water and oil.

I'm going to see what's for lunch. I need to get Rs 1,500 from her for last night's McDonald's.

1:30 p.m.

I hope I get introduced to the brilliant FB CTO Mike Schroepfer one day. He's a genius to run this global platform. I want to build future technologies.

I know my FB COO Sheryl Sandberg level love of writing and personal passion for strategic game chess despite my terrible ability

(Thinking of music: *Bowling for Soup: Microsoft chairman "Bill Gates, Captain of the Chess Team" in song 1985*)

combined with a new skillset in top computer programming will do wonders as I love this sort of thing. I made a Python3 snake game, but it's terrible, it's not a.i. tier clever.

Bill Gates was a good, aggressive businessman at the start. He should use that to solve crises.

I'm sure I can help Zuck get into China. That's the biggest thing that has to be done. Martinn Teng uncle can figure out an in, like he got Dhammika Perera the chance (apparently) to build shopping malls there...

Thu 2 Jan

9:00 p.m.

I found deleted journal entries on my clipboard, which I preserved and copy pasted.

I need to go get dinner. I think it's macaroni. I don't mind it. I love the taste of pork sausages. I'm kinda hungry. I feel pretty sleepy. I might need more ████████████

█████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████ my Chinese flatmate Liu's chilli paste or soya sauce, and I swear to G-d, that dish I prepared, a filet mignon called "the Lehan" with honey and everything, was amazing -- just cause I █████ his ingredients from his cupboard. 😬🤭 I'll return my mum's 4,000 LKR soon.

Sinhalese words, "hora" "kana" translates directly to "secret" "eating", and horakama is the Sinhala word for "theft" or "stealing"

And it takes a ███████████████████████

I'm getting pretty tired. I need to eat and go to sleep. Tomorrow, I'll make some homemade mayonnaise so I can eat my cheesed up fried potato wedges. It's going to be amazing. I think I can eat fried potato wedges every day. I love them. I can't believe I'm 45kg, and so, I can eat that kind of good food all the time. I bet all those ████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████‼️

I miss the Campbell's tomato soup I'd get from England. I loved that tomato soup. Whenever I felt hungry, I'd just get some bread, microwave the soup up, dip and eat it. It was amazing. I can't believe there's no good tomato soup over here. I also miss

Oh yea, before I forget, I added some brown sugar to my filet mignon steak too. That's why it was so sweet and delicious.

Whatever.

I also miss, I miss a lot of things in England. I miss the late night Donner kebabs████████████████████████ because they'd make these amazing donner kebabs in pita bread for me. ██████████████████████████████████████████would be up all the time in their little shops parked outside my university residence with that stuff. It was just 5 quid, but it was delicious.

I was a very rich student. I think I got a lot of money. I got like 900 pounds per month, and I had a great time. I loved all the food I got. █████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████

9:30 p.m.

I'm getting pretty sleepy. I think I'll go to sleep soon. I hope Uwin brings me that precious █████████████████████Graham's tawny port wine bottle I asked him to. Omg, I have a sweet tooth, it's the only alcohol I like.

I think I like the white Russian cocktail and I guess, the whatever, because that white Russian popularised by the Dude in the Big Lebowski is very sweet. I love it. I think Graham's Tawny Port Wine is my favourite because I saw my dad had an empty case of it at home after returning from England and recognizing it. I also saw my dad had a Ballantines, but I don't like that.

Raja uncle claims erroneously that I broke a Chivas Regal or something as a kid in front of them, I don't like that alcohol too. I only like Graham's tawny port wine. Jagath uncle got me (my family)* a box of Cherry soaked in liquor coated in chocolate from M&S, I liked it. I think Graham's is just like that, very sweet.

It's a great invention. Those Portuguese kept the natural sweetness by not fermenting the grapes, and instead, fortifying the grape with alcohol. I love it. ████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████ I think I only like that alcohol, and beer and that's it.

9:45 p.m.

I hate tequila, I had whiskey mostly, I hate vodka, I hate rum (unless a Pina Colada which is also overrated), I hate a lot of alcohol. I like champagne, I like prosecco, I like red wine, I like, i don't know, absinthe? No, I don't know. *Yawn* I'm so ███████ sleepy now.

I think I liked Parliament cigarettes because of Sean Samarasinghe, Charlie Sheen and the hollow tip filter. I liked Davidoff cigarettes because of Koshi aiya. But I never really smoke. I smoked just two cigarettes last on the 18th of December, as every 3rd Wednesday we have Freemason meetings, and I got a mini stroke or headache. I need to avoid smoking.

10:00 p.m.

Iruka Dedigama just copied Sean's Parliament cigarettes and then started smoking them only. He told me he started it. Sean told me Sean started it and told Iruka about it. I think Sean started it. I only started the Cartier cigarettes which are gold plated because I discovered them after Sharma uncle left them, I presume.

I started something else too, but I copied Sean Henricus. Okay, fine, i copied Sean Henricus. So, what? I still won't tell anyone. I started the Bleu de Chanel thing. Everyone copied me. So, I'm not to going to share anything, otherwise everyone else will copy me. Everyone loves to imitate and copy and steal ideas from me or try pretend to be me -- wannabes.

I started all of these rumours and then everyone else just started talking about it. I started the I started the whole- actually, can't talk about that story. I think my family starts rumours, I love it.

I'm so sleepy. I have so much business I gotta do. I dunno why these are so slow. I need to close deals fast. I've incentivised everyone really well. I'm like the market leader in

10:30 p.m.

I need $24,000 to buy an IT asset. I need it. There's only 1 in the world, and 5 people are also trying to purchase it. I need to get it first. I think we can sign our first deal with Dialog Axiata and buy it.

Would I lie to you:

https://youtu.be/4GZ_aDzNkxo

Look into my eyes

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Would I lie to you baby

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(Would I lie to you)

Songwriters: MICK LEESON / PETER BENSON VALE

Would I Lie to You lyrics © Emi Music Publishing France, BMG VM MUSIC LTD

11:00 p.m. Th

Kamal Gunarathna uncle and Shavendra Silva uncle are very innocent. I think I'm different because I believe in the power of technology. I believe the reason that England could rule India was because of technological superiority.

I'm going to modernise our defence system. I think I can get support from Prasad Samarasinghe uncle and Lasantha Waidyaratne uncle too. It's what makes me happiest. It's a lot of work, but it'll ensure within a short period of time, Sri Lanka goes from third world to first privately.

8 matched names linked to the Names index.