A Mostly Locked Night Note

February 3, 2021

The visible page is almost entirely locked away, with only fragments and an ellipsis left on the surface, so there is no fuller T1 or T2 day story to package honestly here.

Wednesday, February 3rd, 2021

8:30 a.m.

I woke up on time. I am happy my sleep and wake times are improving. Now I can have breakfast on time. This is starting to sound like Camelot!

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8:45 a.m.

I think they are doing the laundry. I forgot to give the maid my shirts. I have to do that soon.

I am happy I have terminated relationships with a number of individuals, it was far too stressful for me. They did not seem straight. It was a waste of my time.

When my friends are not coming up with any real value, no real plans and have nothing to offer, the friendship should just be terminated during our annual KPI review meeting.

The best I can do is send them my email address and tell them to write to me if they have a business enquiry.

9:00 a.m.

I wonder what is available for breakfast.

9:15 a.m.

I only like the bacon in SL, it is really good. I need to go see. I think most likely there will be milk rice or something. I dunno, it is a surprise. Last night's homemade pizza was okay, but it was not so great.

I deleted Migara Cabral, I do not know him any more, I will delete Sam Cabral too. I am beginning to feel suspicious of high school friends. I do not need them.

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9:30 a.m.

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11:00 a.m.

11:45 a.m.

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I am unsure about ███████, it is true, I am able to hurt people, but when it is wrong to do it and you do not have to do it, I should not do it. Any mistakes were so small, I have unreasonably treated her wickedly.

Most likely it is suspicion only. To hurt her friends for political reasons is kinda cruel. It is not fair. I have to consider it carefully. I know I must be angry, it is injustice to project unto her, she is innocent.

No matter what, and she did not do anything, there is no proof. You need proof before attacking people, otherwise it is a big sin. I do not know why I spend more time hurting her than ███! It is unjust.

12:00 p.m.

I should wash my hands. I am feeling hot, I need the Air Conditioning. I wish I had some sort of intense mouthwash, I hate having to brush my teeth, cut my beard, hair and nails. It is annoying. I have to do it all the time, all my life.

My grandma used to cut my nails, but one time she cut too far, when you want to do something right, you gotta do it yourself. I am scared to let others cut my nails now. I need a George Clooney hair cutter.

My hair is so long now. I remember my dad used the hairdryer on me, and my hair was shaggy and he laughed at me and said I was like Martinn uncle!

2:45 p.m.

(b)

I think you have about 5 intimate friends, 15 best friends, 50 good friends, 150 friends and 500 acquaintances and 1,500 people you recognise on sight -- who are not really friends. The top 150 are the layer that will consider doing favours.

The thing is that these people are all unequal, they have different values, different characters, stories, they do different things, different age groups, religions, races, different political views, different industries, etc.

I guess, the only real requirement is to have a mutual interest. But even this is tricky. I seem to have made up my mind on an intended outcome, a widening scope and there is a measured success criteria.

It is quite funny. I mean, if you look at cousin Udhantha, cousin Koshitha or cousin Chadu, all of them, they are remarkably quiet. They do not post anything. They do not talk. If you meet in person, it is similar, you might do fun things, but this is the way they always act around people.

With me, I am an open book. The reason I cannot talk about all my business plans on Facebook is because of profit, the profit we earn is a bit high, then the people paying may feel it is stealing, so I avoiding discussing pricing. I give rough ballpark estimates, maybe, but I try to avoid it.

The opposite is required too. If we sign a deal, it is often done under a Nondisclosure Agreement. SL ranks very poorly in terms of the corruption index. In my case, I know I can easily sign bigger deals, so, I do not need to worry about doing things crooked. I prefer if this is revealed, as it legitimises the deal.

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However, again, if you try to hide things, it is suspected as a crime or a dirty deal. This is why you should try to always be open and honest. It is the only way to withstand the test of time. When you do things properly, there is nothing to be afraid of. You are not going to get punished.

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In my case, the people who operate larger US businesses, the big ones, they need to know who they are doing business with. They cannot do business with people who hide, with an empty Facebook, they will worry you are hiding something, that you are a risk and they will be scared:

"How am I supposed to partner this guy on a $1bn investment or project if I do not know who this man really is, what is he hiding, who is he really?"

3:00 p.m.

It is indeed "cruel" to remove friends. It is wicked. They did not do any thing bad or hurt you, and to remove people, it hurts them. It is truly hurtful, I would feel very hurt if some people I care about, unfriended me.

But I mean, I need to know I am safe. I need to make sure that people in my life are pulling their weight. They have to be acting in my interests. I do not need a Lal uncle type friend who will █████████████████████████████████████ and betray me! It is just not worth it.

https://www.abc.net.au/news/science/2016-01-20/150-is-the-limit-of-real-facebook-friends/7101588#:~:text=%22The%20150%20layer%20is%20the,do%20favours%2C%22%20he%20said.

5:30 p.m.

I deleted Wagisha Sumathipala Dedigama. I might unfriend Iruka Dedigama next, I do not need him. I removed Shanil Nethicumara, he is a good guy, but my standards have changed, it used to be SL standards, now it is US CA standards, he does not meet these. I also removed my aunt Sandya, she made a blunder in AU, I do not need her. I kept her daughter Bhakthi A, but I might remove soon, just to lower stress of some kind of contempt. But I mean, it does not matter, I will probably give up on them next.

When I delete, it is a deletion. It is best to move on. There are better people, you need to trust people, you need to really 'get' people who you choose to partner. It is a different set of rules for friends on Facebook, but I prefer to maintain this standard.

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███████, she is not someone who is a big threat, she has done nothing, she cannot fight, it is best to forgive. It is just splash damage on her. It is wrong to project rage on innocent parties. Again, it is confusing, I do not have any reason to target this kind, innocent woman. Even if she was a bit rude, it was not a big deal. Taking pictures of birds is not a big deal. I do not see any reason to target or pursue her. There is absolutely no evidence of any foul play -- at all.

It is best to just target these guys like Lal only.

People like Sandhya aunty, it is best to first get back on my two feet, then go and drag them to see Thilanga uncle by force, make them play cricket together, use my ability to fix it up between our families, end the blood feud, where they did not do much to us. It is a childish fight, it sends a cheap message to society. Upali uncle redeemed himself with the way he respected me out of respect to my uncle, this counts. All he did was sell a stupid BMW (without required papers) to my grandma, maybe support Duminda Silva, maybe compete for Sri Lanka Cricket, this is all.

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6:30 p.m.

(b)

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7:30 p.m.

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Sadly, this does not count as physical activity. I should just do my 10 minute elliptical machine running. It is my minimum. It is my "health thing" i love to do.

7:45 p.m.

My bedroom is not well lit. The lights do not work properly. I am upset. It could be an electricity problem. I worry it will hurt my eyesight.

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I should write this back to James, I should also write to Eddy Bobritsky, he is a cool guy. I love the Jewish people. The Jewish people helped me. I am loyal.

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Who was it?

Oh right.

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They all made their decisions.

They decided stealing from me was the right thing to do!

For that, I do not forgive.

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8:15 p.m.

I want to watch The Purge series. It is one of my favourite. I wish I had some gun touting American friends. I love Americans. I love British. I think I am a pretty liberal person. ███████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████

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8:30 p.m.

I am reading through this psych stuff. Very interesting. My doctors are top in the field. It seems accurate how I push away risky individuals. Someone like Navin Marapana, he blocked me on WhatsApp when I messaged him about a potential FCPA violation I fear. He most likely is too experienced to waste time on my paranoid legal interpretations based on Murphy's law. He probably felt it was ridiculous how I could imagine a FCPA violation. I hope he will however worry about Thilanga uncle's Wikipedia as I am concerned by this. Well, he probably does not need to go.. He is free to go away, stay, I do not care. I do not have any real shared hobbies, though I see he is loyal to my uncle Thilanga and he does support my family's legal case, he even got his friends to rent the office in our house, giving us money, so he is a loyal friend, I cannot just remove someone as a friend when he does that.

Navin and Gamini Marapana are the best lawyers in SL, they have gone out of their way for us, I feel it. Who the heck takes the shirt off their back for you like they do for us? They got their friends to rent our office in our house, to help us. I owe them big time. It is a monumental gesture.

Sandalal uncle, I pushed him away because he took pictures with Deepa at a comedian's show. It was a group photo. It is not fair. I was just traumatised, I was scared, I remembered Lal, I felt betrayed this Sandalal is not a loyal friend. I expect my friends to refuse and ask her to get out of the picture.

Sandalal is a good guy, he is a loyal friend.

He might just say, "it is a group photo at a public event".

8:45 p.m.

It is a pretty simple thing to ask of my friends: DO NOT TAKE PHOTOS WITH MY ENEMIES.

I mean, what is the big idea?

What is so wrong with it?

It is a perfectly fair requirement.

I do not take photos with enemies of my friends.

9:00 p.m.

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https://youtu.be/2aSChTgHRuE

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:)

:D

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I am just writing to entertain -- this idea of Lehan Edirisinghe is..

…there is an idea of a Lehan Edirisinghe, some kind of abstraction, but there is no real me, only an entity, something illusory, and though I can hide my cold gaze and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable:

I simply am not there.

It is hard for me to make sense on any given level.

Myself is fabricated, an aberration.

I am a noncontingent human being.

My personality is sketchy and unformed, my heartlessness goes deep and is persistent.

My conscience, my pity, my hopes disappeared a long time ago (probably at Leicester University) if they ever did exist.

There are no more barriers to cross.

All I have in common with the uncontrollable and the insane, the vicious and the evil, all the mayhem I have caused and my utter indifference toward it, I have now surpassed.

I still, though, hold on to one single bleak truth:

no one is safe, nothing is redeemed.

Yet I am blameless.

Each model of human behavior must be assumed to have some validity.

Is evil something you are?

Or is it something you do?

Quotation I love from my favorite movie, ever:

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But even after admitting this—and I have countless times, in just about every act I’ve committed—and coming face-to-face with these truths, there is no catharsis.

I gain no deeper knowledge about myself, no new understanding can be extracted from my telling.

There has been no reason for me to tell you any of this.

This confession has meant nothing….”

9:30 p.m.

Okay, just to recap my "Lehan for SL" ambitions..

Okay, so, step 1, "be a Freemason". Check

Step 2, "Get a Cult". Let me check this..

* Phone Rings. *

"Hello Charith"

"Yes, Mr Edirisinghe! Sir!"

"Just call me 'Lehan' my friend. What are you doing?"

"Was driving my mum and dad to the emergency ward in the hospital, I pulled over when I saw you calling, then I got out -- I am so sorry it took 2 rings."

"It is fine".

"Thank you, Mr Edirisinghe, I will remember this day for ever and ever in great honour, that you called me-- !"

* Phone Hangs *

* Dial Tone *

"Hello Denzil?"

"THERUWAN SARANAI LEHAN".

"It is fine, Theruwan Saranai".

* Phone Hangs Up *

* Phone Rings *

* There is an old era dialing tone because the person being called is soo old and 76 soon *

( He is 76 tomorrow! )

"Hello Lehan, you remembered me? Listen Shavendra was asking about--"

"Oops, wrong number, sorry!"

* Slams the Phone Receiver *

Okay step 2 is checked!

Step 3 is umm...

What was step 3?

https://youtu.be/8ORQJtxicrA

This town's like a great big p***y

just waiting to get f***ed.

I should've come here years ago.

I'd have been a millionaire by this time.

By this time, I'd have had my own boat,

my own car...

...my own golf course.

You know what I want?

I thought of this the other day.

A line of blue jeans. With my name

written on the back of chicks' asses.

How's that?

That sounds completely crazy to me.

Look at that. Look.

You're missing the sights. That's what

you're doing. We're missing the action.

Want to have some ice cream

with my friend and me?

Get lost, greaseball!

- Look at that.

- "Ice cream"?

- That's right.

- You said "ice cream"?

- Girls like ice cream.

- Come on, man. That's not gonna work.

You can't do it that way.

You know how you pick up chicks

in this country?

- What was that? What you just did?

- That's what you do.

That's disgusting.

- Watch.

- Look at that. You look like a lizard.

Like a bug coming out of your mouth.

That figures you wouldn't understand.

But the women in this country,

when you do that, they know.

- They know what?

- They understand. They go crazy.

It'll take practice, but you gotta learn.

Women love when you suck the p***y.

Look at that.

She's looking at us.

- You think you can do it with her?

- I think I can.

- You want to try it with her?

- Why not?

- You gonna watch me?

- I'm looking at you. Go ahead.

- You won't do it.

- Watch this.

I'm with you, man.

I'm gonna get her.

Go ahead, Romeo! Do your thing.

- Just be quiet. Just hang back.

- Romeo!

You're looking very pretty today.

Yes, you. I've been watching you.

You want to see something funny?

Take a look over there. See that man?

Watch that guy. I gotta sit down here.

I gotta watch my friend

He gonna stick his tongue out to that girl.

Look at that.

You're sick!

You see what happened to him?

- Lf I wasn't a nice guy, I'd crack you.

- She's too big for you.

- Causing trouble like that. Come on.

- B***h!

- What I try to tell you?

- Lesbian!

What I try to tell you? This country,

you gotta make the money first.

Then when you get the money,

you get the power.

Then when you get the power,

then you get the women.

That's why you gotta

make your own moves.

That's the one I rented.

9:45 p.m.

Charith jokingly says, "hello Mr Edirisinghe" when I call him, he is just kidding.

We are going to be big!

It is a cult.

It is definitely a cult.

Our company is a cult.

I am the cult leader.

I love my firm.

We have such a cool story.

I was thinking this Shahan Kumaratunga whatever, Udesh's friend, this guy comes and tells me that some of his friends want to buy our family's birds..

So weird.

What a piece of s***!

His mum Nadeera (I think) sold an aluminium company for a billion bucks to Dhammika Perera.

I am happy high school is over.

I hated school.

Shahan is a cool guy, his --

I do not want to say it.

He is a potato head!

...

No money coming in, just the energy, just the fun, the memories, just the enjoyment, just the show.

We are selling entertainment.

We are selling a dream.

This is what we are really selling.

We are selling more than cyber.

We are selling art.

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Our pet birds will love to see it.

(I doubt she even did anything, but it is a fantastic narrative. Even she did something, it would not matter.)

I think I will gift her 20m LKR and appoint her back into our company, but her designation will be Witch of the West.

I shall be the Witch of the North or better yet--

Galinda.

███████

It is a good thing they are out!

I regret wasting 1 minute on ███████, I was too nice to her, I should have just stood by a fast decision to reject her CV when she applied to be our CEO

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She is so cheap.

I do not know why Thilanga uncle hates Upali so much, the reasons he gave me are not serious.

Sandhya aunty came to see our birds, she did not take any pictures.

Just this ███████.

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...

Hee hee hee

I told Bentsi Ben Atar, over at the Unit 8200 tech division, he was once team leader, somewhat-jokingly but unsure if truly joking or being dead serious, ██████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████

He and I just giggled.

:)

I do not genuinely hate them. There is a lot of good in them and these Iranians.

We need to intervene more with their leadership.

We can earn peace.

I do not hate ███████.

It is quite impossible for anything to happen to us anytime soon.

By next few months, we will have abundant, unlimited money anyway.

I doubt anyone is crazy to mess with us.

The animal welfare guys are busy with animal abuse claims from farms and slaughterhouses and the zoos which are pretty poorly managed.

Even if they came over, what next? What is the charge?

The cages are bigger than entire rooms.

We fit the yacht inside the aviary.

It is probably just some kind of attack.

She has no money.

These construction projects Upali uncle gets, the timber business, it is so so and so.

It is not a very big deal.

Sumal uncle has to work hard for his contracts.

Sandalal is only who he is because Thilanga uncle made him SLT CIO, or at least at the start..

I will probably nab the construction contracts next year.

I am looking at the bigger projects.

The fact is, in any country, you just need the political power to get the big deals.

Which is what we do have.

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I will try grab the International Construction Consortium contracts off them

11:45 p.m.

I better call Alex Marsh, my closest friend, to wish him for his birthday. He is a good guy. I hope he becomes a Freemason like his dad. He also needs support with his business or a great career.

I did my 10 minutes on the elliptical machine. I was listening to Britney Spears -- Sometimes on repeat. I have a lot of energy now to do 10 minutes.

It is strange.

Ever since, Jonathan Hirshon, "blessed me on his birthday as a Jew" which is supposed to be a sacred thing, things have indeed changed.

I seem to have a new life in me. It is quite astonishing. It looks like I am practising magic. I have cast a spell on people in SL. The things I write are super stimuli, it is hard for them to process it.

It is like the Weeknd getting the magic.

Lasantha Wickrematunge, he left a large vacuum in his death. I have tried to fill this gap. I have tried to fill my dad's shoes. I have followed the shadow of Upali Wijewardene.

With Lasantha's spirit, I can do 10 minutes instead of struggling to do 5. Lasantha would walk 30 or 35 minutes to his office, on the same path, he was a teetotaller, like me, he loved Evita Peron the Musical -- I also have the Madonna Star Quality.

The best part about me, is I seem to know EVERYONE in Sri Lanka. You can connect almost anyone in SL to me. All the important people.

It is hard to believe one man (myself, narcissistically), can write away so much magic. It is hard to believe, it is hard to imagine. I just do not seem to stop writing. People just do not seem to stop reading. People are just enthralled. They see something in me, they see hope, they see something impossible: Magic.

I am happy this guy, Selva, the Tamil guy, he gave me his house's living room air conditioning unit. I am happy I get some cool air from his Mr Cool company.

(There is a special place in hell for people like me, besides the 'CEO's Office' where I work, because I see to attach a role and responsibility for everyone. Hmm.. you are good at Call of Duty, you are safe. You, you are good at this, you are safe. )

https://youtu.be/mcK0fJIwnX0

Thursday, February 4th, 2021

12:00 a.m.

Today is Independence Day! It is 73 years since we got independence from the British! I love Sri Lanka!

I was thinking of Suresh Wijesinghe at Connex Information Technologies. I like him a lot. He is a good Sinhalese. I see he is ready to take the hits and shots for the work he is doing. He knows the big guys in Israel and therefore he is a target.

I do not like how our good people took all the damage during the civil war. I will also bravely go into the front lines. I am also willing to take a hits, punches and shots.

https://youtu.be/D_Vg4uyYwEk

Transcript:

“Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard ya hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done! Now if you know what you’re worth then go out and get what you’re worth. But ya gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain’t where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody! Cowards do that and that ain’t you! You’re better than that! I’m always gonna love you no matter what. No matter what happens. You’re my son and you’re my blood. You’re the best thing in my life. But until you start believing in yourself, ya ain’t gonna have a life. “

1:00 a.m.

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I loved to hear our Air Force fly jets over us. I love how we won our war for freedom in SL.

The Tamils outnumber us 3 to 1 globally, but we got the LTTE marked as a terrorist organisation globally and defeated them somehow.

LTTE were cowards, they used suicide bombing and targeted civilians. It is unfortunate they were able to become such an annoyance as a repercussion of our weak economy.

We need a strong rule of law, a functioning judiciary, etc. I will be watching Independence Day celebrations on tv or maybe meet my family members.

I am watching a MasterClass by Daniel Pink on sales. I will update my firm's website. Then I will sleep. I think things are going well.

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They are so cheap. █████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████ ██████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████

1:30 a.m.

███████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████ I remember when I was in school, I was a bit of a bully, though never a physical bully, I sort of had thuggish friends around as the muscle for some reason. Everyone thinks I am the mafia boss!

I do not know. I realised Chenuka and Chenukshi are twins. So, I would tease Chenuka that his name was "Chenukshi" and he would get really annoyed. I had no idea. I did not think it was all that insulting. It was not a big deal, I could not believe he was so upset!

Then one day, his dad came along, he came and spoke to me, he told me not to call him Chenukshi haha! Give me a break! No wonder the guy turned out to be a real f***ing wuss! █████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████ Hahahaha he should have come and thanked me!

https://youtu.be/ooDTHJn4azc

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I took Srinath to Tan Tock Seng hospital. I tried to hit on the nurse. She told me to put on weight. ████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████ That Ashwini Radha's friend. I do not know.

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8 matched names linked to the Names index.